February 2011

Mila Kunis doesn’t have a huge rack but that didn’t stop her from blasting out her guns as best as she could last night at the Oscars. I not only appreciate the effort but I love her hotness. It’s no surprise Justin Timberlake is pumping his penis in her now. She’s got it going on in a major way and on a night when so many hot actresses dressed down (couldn’t you have shown off your award-winning jugs, Scarlett?), Mila reminded us what the Oscars are really about.

Hot chicks showing off their tits.

The Oscars were boring as shit. It was easy to see having James Franco and Anne Hathaway as hots was going to be an epic fail and somehow it managed to be even worse. Franco was stoned and has the personality of a piece of wood. Hathaway at least tried hard but the whole thing looked like an audition for a bad high school play.

The only time the show had any life was when Billy Crystal showed up. Unfortunately he was only there to present and not host which again showed how creatively bankrupt the show was this year.

It was pretty embarrassing all around and somehow managed to make Rob Lowe singing look like a brilliant creative decision by comparison.

Oh, some English film won because the Academy doesn’t believe commercially successful films are “art” and Vanessa Hudgens showed up looking hot. Too bad she didn’t get any screen time during the show. It might’ve saved that ship from sinking cuz she’s really fucking hot.

It says so on her shirt. See?

She’s so badass.

Rihanna had a birthday this week and she celebrated in perfect Rihanna style – by showing off her fabulous mocha jugs. This chick is off the charts smoking hot and she knows it. That’s good and bad. The good is she wants everyone to appreciate her incredible body every second of the day. The bad is she’s probably really picky about who she fucks. In other words she’ll only fuck really rich and famous guys.


But I still lust after you Rihanna. My cock belongs to you. All you have to do is claim it. It’s a nice tax write-off too.

Think about it baby.

Suddenly, my cock has gotten very hard.


You be the judge.

I don’t get the whole Justin Bieber thing. I’m sure he/she/it is a great guy/girl/thing but why is Selena Gomez sucking his cock (if he has one) and letting him fuck her (with a cock or strap on)? What does she possibly get out of having sex with a 10-year old? I’m pretty much baffled by the female gender on a daily basis and this is one of the biggest reasons why. They pick the most bizarre and often incomprehensible people to allow into their vaginas.

Anyway, Selena Gomez is hot. I love her tits and she’s starting to show them off to the world so we can all appreciate her wondrous 18-year-old jugs. Which is the least she can do for fucking a 10-year old.

If you’ll recall the last time Lindsay Lohan went to court she dressed like a porn star. Clearly she wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice, was she?

Well …

OK, so she’s not dressed like a whore this time, but she still couldn’t resist showcasing her rack for the judge. The best part of this is I love the fact she thinks showing off her tits is appropriate. This is why we love you, Lindsay. Because you’re a dumb slut.

Don’t ever change.

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